In a classic display of adaptability under pressure, legendary football coach Bill Belichick brushed off recent media drama and got back to what really matters: building his team. According to sources at UNC, Belichick was spotted calmly placing his girlfriend in a Pack ‘n Play before running spring drills with the Tar Heels.
After reportedly being unable to secure last-minute childcare, Belichick made the call to bring her to the practice field. “Alright, sweetheart, Daddy’s got to go coach the big boys now,” Belichick was heard saying. “Here’s your sippy cup, some Veggie Straws, and Mr. Snuggles. You be good for Billy-Bill.”
The coach, known for his stone-faced sideline demeanor, didn’t miss a beat. “We trust our process,” he said at the post-practice press conference. “If childcare isn’t an option, we adapt. I checked on her between reps. She’s fine. I’m fine. The team’s fine. We’re on to the next play.”
Sources within the program said Belichick is now exploring whether a staff iPad could stream Cocomelon during practices, and there’s talk of hiring a “team nanny” to accompany the girlfriend on road games.